Holiday Ideas for Empty Nest Single Moms

I remember the first time as an empty nest single mom I was alone for Christmas Eve. InitialIy was so very sad because I grew up with Christmas Eve being a 4 generation celebration. When they were growing up I always had them on Christmas Eve and they would usually go to be with their dad sometime on Christmas Day. When they started to have partners then there was more family to share them with. Because my parents and siblings are spread out over many northern states we had long ago stopped getting together for winter holidays. All of that left me sad, lonely, and alone.

Of course I would prefer to have my adult children and their wives with me for every holiday I know that is not realistic or fair. So I’ve come up with some different possibilities to make holidays special when I am not able to be with them.

Empty Nesters Connecting with Friends or Family on Holidays

One option for holidays is to celebrate with friends. Many people now celebrate Friendsgiving on or close to Thanksgiving. I’ve enjoyed going to Christmas Eve church and having a game night with a couple of other single moms who didn’t have family to spend Christmas Eve with.

When I had a partner I often spent several Thanksgivings with his family. The first Thanksgiving I was single and the kids were with their dad I had to come up with a different plan, but more about that idea later.

If you have extended family you could be with them on a holiday even if your children will not be there with you.

Single Moms Work or Volunteer on Holidays

I know several single people who work in the medical or law enforcement fields who offer to work on Christmas, New Year’s Eve, or Thanksgiving if they don’t have family to celebrate with. They enjoy the opportunity to make time and a half or more by working the holidays. Another single man I know has a tradition of volunteering to help serve community meals on Thanksgiving and Christmas. You can do this if you are alone or volunteer with a friend if you know someone else who has no plans for a holiday.

Use Holiday Alone Time as Self Care Time

For many years a friend of mine whose children’s father lived out of state was alone for Christmas and Christmas Eve. She developed a tradition of celebrating Christmas and Christmas Eve with her children on New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. On Christmas and Christmas Eve, she helped at a church service, sometimes she spent time with a close friend’s family, but mostly she looked forward to the time f taking care of herself by eating something simple she wanted to and watching what she wanted to on TV or just having a couple of days to read. She found the time a welcome break from months of mothering alone with no breaks or help.

Single Moms Can Travel Alone During Holidays

The first time I was alone and not dating at Thanksgiving I decided to try a solo trip to someplace warm and went to St. Petersburg, Florida. I had a great time exploring different art galleries in St. Petersburg. I talked to the kids during the trip and enjoyed a great visit.

One of my son’s wife’s family lives several states away and this was their year to be with her family for Christmas. I’ve moved so the friend I’ve spent Christmas Eve with in the past lives several hours away. I decided it would be a great time to do some radical self-care. By radical self-care I mean I decided to do something I really wanted to do.

I decided to take a trip out of the country to Ecuador. I knew I could take a week or two and decided I wanted to do something easy. I have friends who have traveled with G Adventures. It is a great company that focuses on using locally owned businesses and keeps the costs lower than a lot of other tour companies.

How to Have a Fun Holiday When You Are Alone

For me the difference between having a sad, lonely holiday and a fun, memorable holiday has been my thoughts related to the challenge of being alone during a holiday. I let myself feel sad, but then focus on what is possible instead of what is missing. For me what I do have is time off from work and the freedom to do something I want to do without needing to consider what someone else wants or needs to do. As a single mom that is a rare luxury. So ask yourself, “What do I want to do?”. I know you may answer “Spend it with my kids”. So the next question is, “What else is possible for me to do with this time?”.

Be flexible about when and how you celebrate a holiday. If you won’t be with your kids on the day of the holiday celebrate it on a different day or in a different way with them. Then think about what else is possible for you to do on the holiday. If you can work it might be an opportunity to make extra money. If you have free days from work ask “What could I do?”.

More Holiday Ideas

How to Get Through Your First Christmas as a Single Mom

Family Christmas Traditions to Start for $5 or Less

How to Have a Magical Christmas on a Tight Budget

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