This interview is a part of a series, Inspirational Stories of Single Mothers.
What was one of the most difficult times in your life as a single mom? What made that time challenging?
When I first became a single mom, I left a partner who was larger-than-life, dramatic, charismatic… and abusive. Life with him was never dull or predictable. We were used to living in a charged environment, always wondering what would happen next.
In the months after I left him, my ex was a whirlwind of anger and destruction. I was constantly on high alert. One day, I woke up and someone had thrown a rock as big as a running shoe through our front window. Another day, we were driving to a birthday party and suddenly our van stopped working. While getting our fuel system replaced, we rented a car. During the night, someone slashed the rental car’s tires and broke its windows. Bad things kept happening.
Taking Charge of My Own Safety
I believe that every challenge gives us an opportunity to learn and grow. What important life lessons did you learn from that time in your life?
What did you do to overcome those challenges?
How are you financially supporting your family and how does that fulfill your mission or calling in life?
I work as a digital marketing consultant. Because I’ve been able to build my career working from home, that flexibility makes it much easier to do the “mom” things I need to do.
Have you changed what you do for work or how you do your work since becoming a single mom?
What advice do you have for women who are in the beginning stages of separation and divorce?
Don’t be afraid to leave a relationship that puts you in danger–but don’t do it alone. Talk to people you trust and find programs or professionals to help you. Be patient, be brave, and take it one day at a time.
What are you reading or what would you recommend?
Year of Yes by (single mom) Shonda Rhimes. Listening (on Audible) to how Ms. Rhimes stepped out of her shell and into her power is empowering and inspiring.
What quote inspires you and why?
One I saw on a card a paraphrase of Mizuta Masahide’s haiku.
“The barn has burned down… now I can see the stars.”
“What was life like before being a single mom and what was my story?” I’ve tried to share a bit of the bumpy ride in my answers, but boy was it bumpy!
Hi, I’m Tamara the creator of Empowered Single Moms, a single mom, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LICSW) and the author of Thriving a Single Mom’s Guide to a Happy, Positive Life and Thriving a Single Mom Journal. I have a solo private psychotherapy practice where I treat anxiety, depression, and relationship issues.
As a member of the Empowered Single Moms community, I believe you can stop carrying the weight of the world alone and build a life you love. Join my mailing list and get 5 Keys to Single Mom Success.